Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Elegance Rather Than Luxury

To live content with small means; to seek elegance rather than luxury, and refinement rather than fashion; to be worthy, not respectable, and wealthy, not rich; to listen to stars and birds, babes and sages, with open heart; to study hard; to think quietly, act frankly, talk gently, await occasions, hurry never; in a word, to let the spiritual, unbidden and unconscious, grow up through the common - this is my symphony.

William Henry Channing

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

God and Nacho Cheese

Nathan's reaction to low-calorie food

When I get to heaven, God's not going to have an awful lot to say about me... I'm not going to get one of the Patient or Generous or Kind prizes. Heck, I'm not even up for Most Improved (which always goes to the kid who didn't qualify for anything else). What He can say for me, however, is that I was grateful for my food.

I don't mean grateful in an "I once was starving and now I'm well-fed" way. It's more like, "I am truly giddy that you have provided for me with cheese and chocolate cake" way. It may be less moving, but BOY do I get excited about food. My pre-meal prayers tend to be heart-felt and full of enthusiasm.

With that understanding of my spiritual motivation behind us, you will no doubt understand how very thrilled... elated... I was when Taco Bell improved upon their Double Decker (which was almost perfect, already) by adding nacho cheese to the fatty fatty refried beans.
Praise. God. for Nacho Cheese.

It will be in heaven, with every single calorie and trans-fat that it represents. And maybe more. Because we all know that calories taste good. If a food item has 3 calories, it doesn't taste very good, but if it has 3000 (Bloomin' Onion, anyone?), it's delicious. Preservatives can ruin raw calorie flavor, but this really complicates the "more calories, more flavor" rule. That's why places like McDonalds and Chili's aren't very tasty, despite their high calories.

But Nacho Cheese cancels out preservatives, so Taco Bell is still okay.

All that to say, go to Taco Bell, eat that hydrogenated, trans-fatty, 89 cent-per-taco goodness and tell me it doesn't make you want to bow your sinner's head and PRAISE the LORD.

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Good. Lord.

And I do mean, Good Lord.
The Good Lord has been working overtime since Nate was born. This chair is supposed to contain him with its seat belt, not enable him to bungee jump for dropped toys. I found him like this. I had left the room (but carefully buckled him in beforehand) to get my shoes and when I got back, he was upside-down and grunting, trying to pick up his toy.

Being the good mother I am, I took a couple pictures before righting him. I took these on my phone though, so pardon the graininess.

Once more, with both hands:

I might be in need of a nanny.

Monday, April 11, 2011

This Blog is Like a Box of Chocolates

... and I bet you wish you knew what you were gonna get


My other half (the lawn-mowing, trash-toting, oil-changing half) is still in Nevada, so I'm still in charge of the outdoor portions of home. Nevada is the middle of nowhere. More on that later.

Unfortunately grass continues to grow after you cut it once. San Diego has also been quite rainy. Which (thank you, First Grade) makes grass grow faster. I've been avoiding it all, but today Jon called and let me know that he would be leaving a week earlier and gone a week longer on the next work-up than previously planned.

Since 'The Navy' is unlisted in the phone book, I attacked the lawn.

Well I tried.

I located the weed wacker and successfully turned it on for... 20 seconds. I think it needs more line. I don't know why it stopped. Henry walked outside as I was heading towards the lawnmower, my Plan B. "I'm a lawn guru," I told him out loud.

strut. strut.

I turned it on and started to push towards the grass when a BIG lizard ran out from underneath. I screamed and ran away.

('guru' is a loose term.)

I mowed the front but only like three swipes of the back yard.

The overgrown tomato plant got ripped out of the garden and lavender and chives joined the rosemary and romaine lettuce in its place. We'll see about all that. This was successfully done with no breakage or screaming. Except for the lettuce leaves I accidentally broke off. And the plant I inadvertently ripped out with the tomato.

I should stick to housework.